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Local Swinger Club Vs Online Swinger Dating

Swinger DatingIn an increasingly technological and interconnected world, digital connections have become integral to many people’s lives. This page, which once would have been reserved to a single sheet of paper in a single village, can now be viewed by millions around the globe simultaneously. It is unsurprising, then, that the internet has become a major part of sexual exploration. Sex acts that individuals may have thought uncommon now have full communities dedicated to them, and previously obscure fetishes are well-known. Swinger dating sites are no exception; within the past two decades, websites dedicated to couples have risen to meet the previously-untapped demand.The United States have around nine million adults that are currently practising, or recently practised, spouse swapping.

Finding other couples within the swinging lifestyle is a naturally systematic one whereby couples “find other swingers through magazines, websites with personal advertisements, as well as at specialized parties, vacations, and clubs. Further, there are numerous swingers’ events throughout the country, ranging from swingers’ cruises, clubs, or conventions” (Serina et al. 2013, 350). Websites serve the same purpose that magazine and newspaper advertisement did in the 1970s and 1980s; advertising the major events and organizations that connect swinging couples, albeit in a more affordable and wide-reaching manner.

Indeed the three major types of swinging websites are:

1) Finding other couples for hook-ups 

Finding other couples for hook-ups traditionally happened in specialized clubs often called “lifestyle” clubs, although it has become more common in recent years to see the term “swinger club” used in reference to these establishments. These establishments, which typically charge a membership and solicit donations, were the main way to find other couples. Specialized sites, however, help couples connect prior to meeting in person. Most reputable sites, in a similar vein as conventional online dating platforms, charge a monthly fee to allow for messaging between couple profiles. The advantage of these sites is to let couples try to vet one another a bit more prior to meeting, which is recommended for more nervous couples.

2) Hosting information about upcoming events for couples (Swinglifestyle.com)

The shift towards online information dissemination initiated in 1998 with the launch of swingerlifestyle.com.  This website’s longevity denotes the success of shifting marketing materials to a digital realm for clubs and events.Major clubs in the west, which include Toronto’s X Club, New York City’s Oasis, and London’s Fever Club, shifted their primary venue information away from print and towards online. Major events also shifted their advertising towards major online venues. While you may still find venues or events that focus exclusively on print media, most to all larger ones will have an online presence on account of the lower costs in reaching wider audiences.

3) Informational Websites 

This lifestyle has an entire subculture that has a vibrant community of contributors interested in sharing experiences and advice. These websites contain exactly the type of information you would expect: how to talk to your partner about it, fun practises, staying safe, connecting with other couples outside of intercourse, and so-forth.  Anybody unsure of swinging, whether or not

So what are the pros/cons of each approach? The pros are multi-fold. It is easier to find a wider range of people as local clubs will not encompass every type of person. Newcomers may also find speaking to other couples online less intimidating than speaking to them in person, especially where they can more easily withdraw if something does go wrong. It allows couples, upon agreeing to meet, to meet in a more relaxed environment than they may find in a club setting, especially if intercourse is not expected for the initial meet-up.While the internet was originally viewed as an anonymous platform, this era is over. Websites ultimately “are less about disguise and more about information”(Kreston 2014, 95), especially in context of couples interested in meeting up. These websites allow for couples to gain more information about their prospective partners before making any commitments.

Swinger ClubsNothing, however, is without its cons. People are not always the same in online and offline platforms, although increasing transparency of the internet is partially alleviating this risk. To minimize this risk further, it is recommended to speak to the other couple via video calls first and clearly outline expectations of when you do meet up. There are also concerns among privacy advocates of the security of online hook-up websites. With an increasingly-connected world, the risks associated with entering personal information online are ever present. Major data leaks are a risk for all platforms and, as the Ashley Madison leak demonstrated, no servers are 100% secure. It is noteworthy, however, that swingers are typically less concerned with secrecy – that is hiding their lifestyle for the purpose of protecting themselves– so much as privacy – which encompasses who is permitted to be privy to specifics of their sex lives. In interviews with members engaged in the lifestyle, sociologists noted that respondents “emphasize that they were more interested in not sharing their lifestyle because it was no one’s business, rather than feeling that they must keep it secret to protect themselves” (Vailancourt and Few-Demo 2014, 316). It is therefore unlikely, even in the event of a major leak, that couples will be negatively affected from any social stigmas.

These websites are ultimately a continuation of the culture’s long-standing trend of using specialized media outreach systems to advertise centralized meeting events and lists of interested couples. It is impossible to fully separate the lifestyle into offline and online variants because of how thoroughly proponents of swinging have embraced digital mediums.

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What to Do When You First Meet Your Swinger Dates

swinger datesIf making the decision to start swinging with your partner seemed scary enough, the journey to your meet your first swinger dates can leave you with nails bitten back all the way to the bone. The first thing to understand is that this is perfectly normal and was something all of us swingers went through. All types of hookup dating are nerve wracking to begin with, but once you get a few notches under your belt, you will never look back.

Whether or not this is your first swingers date, we have put together a list of things to remember to help you beat your nerves so you can concentrate on just having a really fun filled enjoyable time.

Once you have met a couple you like, usually through one of the great swingers online dating sites, and have done the groundwork of getting to know them a bit, it won’t be long before the time comes to actually meet them face to face to have some fun.

Before meeting them, we always recommend that you setup a code word that will let your partner know that you don’t like your dates and wish to call it off. Since you never know what couples are going to be like until you meet them in person, code words are an excellent way of communicating to your partner without the others knowing. Along with this code word, you should have prepared an excuse to help you get out of there without causing offence. One of my personal favorites is a well-timed ‘pocket call’ from your partner, which allows you to pretend to have a conversation with whoever it is that will give you a reason to leave. Avoid too serious topics like car accidents or dead pets, but minor emergencies such as having to pick up a friend’s kids from school, or an urgent need to help an elderly neighbor, are both perfectly fine and believable.

When it comes to the actual date, things will go much smoother if you pick a good place to meet. Avoid hotel lobbies and any other such openly public place. Instead, you should try a bar or a restaurant that has a good level of background noise, so you can relax knowing you will not be overheard. It is definitely a good idea to have already decided beforehand if you are just meeting for a chator are going to go for the hookup after too.Having this already decided, helps to relieve tension.

 

Here are a few final tips before you meet:

 

  • Be punctual and exchange phone numbers just in case
  • Dress well
  • Try not to be too nervous
  • Don’t get drunk
  • Don’t have too high expectations
  • Bring your own condoms lube etc. (If planning a hookup)

 

What to do and say when you finally meet:

 

Meeting any person for the first time can be a bit of a challenge, but if you are a just about to jump into becoming swingers, then it really can feel like a lot of pressure. Start by remembering that you have your partner there, so you both can support each other if the need arises. You should have already gotten to know your swinger dates a little bit online beforehand, so meeting them as much of a surprise as you imagine. An added bonus of them likely being an experienced swinger’s couple is that they will be able to guide the conversation and events leading up to and including the hookup. This will make things feel much more natural.

Upon meeting your dates, always remember to be polite and to greet them with a smile. A smile has been proven to reinforce trust and to represent that person as being nice and friendly. Even though you probably got to know each other online already, it is worth introducing yourselves again as this will really help to get the conversation going. So far as what to talk about, it is best to just stick to what makes you comfortable, and remember to always be yourself. If you try too hard, you will come across as being a little desperate or even strange.

Keep the topics lighthearted and for the time being, avoid talking too much about the reason why you are meeting up. Generally, you should express a good level of interest in the other couple, something which can be achieved by asking them frequent questions, for example.

 

Good topics include:

 

How they met/have been a couple

Hobbies/interests

Countries they have visited etc.

The conversation can be helped along with a small drink, which will help loosen inhibitions and get everyone in the mood. Again, it is strongly advised that you don’t drink more than 1 or 2 drinks in total, as getting drunk or even a little tipsy in these situations not only risks you doing or saying the wrong thing but also can detract from the pleasure later on.

 

How to get the action to the bedroom

 

Well, this is generally the easy bit, especially as both couples feel like they want to make it happen.  It can be as simple as saying something like “should we go somewhere a little more comfortable?” or “we really like you guys, so how about we go to the hotel?” This is another useful time to have a code word in order to check with your partner that he/she is happy to take things to the next level.

A really great tip is when heading to the hotel/room you should pair up with the person you will be having sex with. Walking is a healthy activity that allows for a nice distraction for the nerves as well. Walking causes a release of dopamine in the brain which makes you feel happier and calmer. From this moment on, you should stick in these ‘pairs’ as it will help things seem more natural when you get into the bedroom. Avoid sticking too closely to your life partner as it might show disinterest to the other couple.

 

How to get the action started

 

swinger sexOnce you make it to the bedroom, it is a good idea to sit down with your new sex partner in a way that makes you nice and close. Music is a great aphrodisiac in this situation, though you should definitely avoid putting on a TV as this will cause too much distraction and dampen the atmosphere. Another small drink helps a lot at this point when you should begin cozying up to your new partner. You should really be flirting heavily by now and increasing the amount of physical contact to get things started. Once they do, you only need to go with the flow. Remember to always focus on your sex partner rather than your life partner (should you decide to have sex in the same room/bed).

Once the sex has started, you will find yourself very quickly into the flow of things and fully enjoying all the excitement and fun of being a swinger now that you have freed yourself from the shackles of your old relationship.  Remember to just relax and enjoy the fun.

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8 Easy Steps to Make Your Relationship Swing

easy stepsThe simple truth is it is inevitable that at some point the sex in any relationship will grow stale and lose its excitement. The problem with this is that sex is a really important part of maintaining a healthy relationship, something that until recently was sadly overlooked.

Sex is not just an activity that helps to reinforce the intimacy of a relationship, but is also a physical activity that helps to give the body a workout while also releasing a chemical compound call dopamine into your brain. Dopamine is the brain’s reward for doing physical activity and is vital for a feeling of wellbeing and happiness. During and after sex, the brain releases large amounts of dopamine which results in us feeling happier and relaxed.

For this reason, sex is a very important part of a relationship that can’t be ignored. Fortunately, there are lots of things that you can do when your sex life begins to lose its excitement. Kinky Sex, BDSM, and Swinging are all great options that will certainly bring back the excitement and take you to new heights sexually, as well.

A staggering 60% of first-time swingers said that opening up their relationship to swinging improved their happiness and their relationship as a whole. When this figure is compared to the 1.5% of couples who said that swinging had made the relationship worse, the advantages of swinging are plain to see.

If you are someone who wants to open your relationship up to swinging then here are a few useful tips on how to do so:

  1. Honesty is king

The founding stone of all healthy relationships is honesty. There is a huge difference between swinging and cheating, the latter involving deception and dishonesty, which will almost certainly destroy your relationship. Being honest is not just about being truthful with the other person, but is also about being truthful with yourself and your feelings.

  1. Be sure that you really want to swing

Before you get anywhere near bringing this topic up with your partner, you need to have a serious think about whether or not you really want to get into swinging. Most people start thinking about swinging when they see it in a movie or in a porn film that makes it appear to be only fun and excitement. Getting into swinging definitely presents couples with some real emotional challenges that can destroy a relationship, if not overcome. Emotions such as jealousy and rejection will certainly rear their ugly heads and when they do, must be overcome in an adult, non-destructive way.

To make sure you are ready, the first thing you will need to do is to ask yourself some serious questions about why you want to get into swinging and if you think you are mentally up to it.

  1. Telling your partner

Opening up to your partner is a really huge obstacle that you will need to face. Remember, once you have decided that swinging is something you want to explore, you must at least open up to your partner and get your feelings out. Don’t make the mistake of keeping them locked up inside and never giving yourself the chance to explore these desires.

Though it is hard to be honest about sexual thoughts that are not part of what is considered to be normal sexual behavior, the simple fact is that you must. To tell your partner you can either try the soft or hard approach.

Probably the best way, the soft approach involves dropping small hints from time to time in order to initiate a response. This could be referring to an article, film or anything else that brings up the topic of swinging. Questions such as:‘what do you think about swingers?’ and ‘did you ever think of trying swinging? should get a reaction from your partner that will give you an idea of their opinion on the subject.

The hard approach involves sitting your partner down for a talk and confiding in them about your desires. This has a risk of backfiring if they get offended, so you should make sure you are ready for this.

  1. Give them time

After you have opened up to your partner they will almost certainly need time to process what you have told them. A good idea is to direct them to resources to help them get a better picture of what swinging really means and what it involves. If they need to ask more questions, make sure you are ready to answer them.

  1. Set boundaries

Once they have agreed to swinging, you will both need to sit down and come up with a few ground rules to make sure things go smoothly. This is important as there are lots of ways to swing. Some couples will only engage in ‘soft’ activities such as touching and oral sex. Others will engage in ‘hard’ activities such as full intercourse and group sex. It is vital to have rules in place that respect both your boundaries.

  1. Meet like-minded couples online

swinging relationshipThe best way to start your journey into swinging is to meet another swinger couple online and take it from there. A couple, opposed to two single swingers, will be much better at making things more relaxed and easy. They will know each other well and crucially, will have experienced what it is like going through this experience as a couple first-hand. As a result, they should make excellent guides to help you with any nervousness an doubts you both might have.

  1. Go slowly and build your confidence

Just because you have decided to swing it doesn’t mean that you need to jump in at the deep end. Take it slowly and let your confidence build. Going slowly will also give you both time to make sure that if you have any doubts, you can both work them out. If you have found a couple then go on a few dinner dates with them first to get to know them, and just take things from there.

  1. After you are in, make sure you hit a good swingers party

So you are now fully fledged swingers? Well, the great news is that this is just the beginning. Once you have hooked up with a couple then it is time to blow your mind at a good swinger’s party. There are thousands of great parties organized each week, which range from small gatherings in someone’s home to full on swinger cruises. No matter which type you prefer, it is definitely time to get yourselves to a full on swingers party and have some real fun.

 

For more online swinger dating resources, please check out my own research – Best Dating Sites Reviews for Swingers

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A Beginner’s Guide to the Swinger Lifestyle

swinger partyA lot of couples reach a point in their relationship where they’re a little bit bored… or, they become interested in other people. It’s natural—some would even argue that humans weren’t made to be monogamous. But regardless of your position on monogamy, it’s normal to look at other people and maybe even imagine having sex with them.

Swinging is a good way for couples to explore their sexuality and spice up their own sex lives while still feeling safe in their relationship. It’s more comforting than having an open relationship, as your partner is typically still in the vicinity.

While swinging does seem enticing, it can be a murky—and potentially dangerous—territory for first-timers. Let’s get into a few tips that’ll help you decide whether you’re ready to swing, as well as some tips to make that first step.

 

  • Talk it over beforehand with your partner.

While you may be excited about the prospect of hooking up with other couples, your partner may not be as thrilled about it. It’s important to make sure the two of you are on the same page. Don’t try and strongarm your lover into swinging, as that will only create resentment and jealousy.

 

  • Educate yourselves.

Make sure the both of you understand what swinging actually is. Sure, it’s fun to have sex with other people—maybe it’s your kink to have your husband or wife watch you have sex with someone else. But do yourself a favor and educate yourselves on the lifestyle.

Try and find a mentor—someone who lives a swinger lifestyle and can tell you about the pros and cons of it. Be that online or in real life. You’ll be opening yourself up to diseases and you’ll have to place an importance on safe sex once again.

Swinging is not a way to fix a relationship in turmoil. It’s not going to rekindle a burnt-out relationship and it definitely won’t improve your sex life if it’s bad to begin with. That will only create resentment, jealousy, and ultimately, the end of your relationship. On the other hand, swinging is great for confident couples who are able to taper their insecurities. You and your husband or wife may even grow closer as a result of swinging.

 

  • Establish rules.

This is probably the most important step to follow. It’s also the number one rule that those new to swinging don’t follow, which makes their swinging experience a disaster.

Every couple will have their own rules. It’s important to talk to your partner to find out what they are and aren’t comfortable with and to honor that. If your partner doesn’t want you to kiss anyone else, respect that. Discuss possible scenarios that could happen and make sure you both would handle them the same way. Set boundaries—figure out what’s appropriate and isn’t.

At the end of the day, only you and your spouse can decide what is okay and what isn’t.

 

  • Do not get attached or jealous.

 

You definitely do not want to get attached to anyone that you and your spouse end up having sex with. Keep the act to the physical nature of it. Don’t exchange phone numbers if it isn’t absolutely necessary. If you feel yourself getting attached to one of your playmates, distance yourself from them. Don’t put yourself in situations that could hurt your partner because, at the end of the day, swinging is a couple activity.

Likewise, try not to get angry-jealous. This is why it’s important to set up rules beforehand. If you aren’t comfortable with your husband performing oral sex on another woman, make that known. Limit the possible scenarios that could leave you jealous.

 

  • Go online.

 

Nowadays, you can find just about anything online.  That includes sexual partners who are interested in just about any kink or fetish you can think of. Scoping out potential couples online to swing with is a safe way to discover the scene and narrow down what you and your spouse are looking for. It’s a more inactive approach to swinging than going to a swingers club, but it’s less daunting than the club.

One thing to keep in mind regarding online dating is that you need to make sure you’re safe. Maybe first plan to meet couples at a coffee shop if you’re interested in meeting them beforehand. If you’re not, still meet up somewhere public and walk to where you’re going to play together. Don’t give someone your address over an app.

 

  • Try the swingers’ club.

 

Finally, after meeting up with a few couples online, establishing yourself in the swingers’ scene, and working out the kinks, you and your spouse may feel ready to go to the swingers’ club. If you’re more comfortable doing things online, more power to you, but a club is a totally different experience.

One thing a swinger’s club isn’t is an orgy. Instead, a swinger’s club is more like a bunch of smaller groups having sex. Most clubs have private rooms you can retreat to with whoever you choose, so you don’t have to have sex out in the open if that’s not what you want to do. There’s also swinger’s club etiquette—no one’s going to approach you and just begin to touch you inappropriately. There and signs and signals and people use to signify interest, so do some research on that beforehand.

With all of that said, swinging can be a very liberating experience. It’s a great way to strengthen the bond between you and your spouse while still enjoying the experience of having sex with different people. Successful swingers are known to cheat less and are much happier overall. So, if you and your partner decide you’re interested, establish some rules, start slow, and be safe.

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A Walk Through of the Swingers Club: Where Swinging Couples Are Hooking Up

swinger roomI am an extreme partier and lover of alcohol and all beautiful things. I pride myself as the been there, done that type of girl. But I do believe in advancing and improving. Fortunately, my two best friends were interested in opening my eyes to a whole new world. They claim that going to a swingers club will broaden my horizon. I have heard interesting stories about swingers club, but have never been there before. The basic impression that I have gotten was a mountain full of people having sex in one place. I was a little bit curious as to what the experience might be like, so I have agreed to go the swingers club with them.

 

My first experience in a swingers club was in Las Vegas Nevada. It was very nerve-racking and intimidating to step foot in an environment that is very unknown and out of the ordinary. When we enter the check-in desk, we had to sign a nondisclosure which states that “what goes on here stays in here.” We were not allowed to take pictures or selfies in there. The guest in the club were all anonymous and everything was confidential. This was to protect everybody’s reputation. One of the most dangerous parts of being in these clubs was the fact that it can ruin your reputation. Afterward, we would make a payment for the admissions fee. We were directed to a locked room where we can put our stuff away. I have noticed that everybody was wearing lingerie, bikinis, or better yet, naked. There were also people wearing mask and costumes.

 

One area of the club contains a bar, a booth, dance floor, poles, and a cage. There were strippers, pole dancers, and beautiful erotic women in the cage. The club was dark with dimly, lit lights and dancers everywhere. It was like being in an inferno or Lair. There was also another room with a huge hot tub, spa, and Jacuzzi. There were even couples having orgies in the water. I also notice that some people like to sit and watch. As I walk further down, I notice a big door that was shielded off. It leads to a room that we had to pay extra to get in. This requires that everyone gets naked. The room contains a bed and a lot of BDSM toys, whip, chain, leather, etc.

 

What I like most about the club was that it has multiple rooms, so provides us with different choices depending on our mood. If you just want to dance and chill, you can be at the club, the bar or the booth. If you want to be in the water, there’s the spa or hot tub. If you really want to get kinky, you can be in the BDSM room or the sex room with the huge bed. 

 

Another aspect I love about the club was that it was filled with different types of people. There were beginners like me who are just curious about the atmosphere. We just sat there and watch, it could be awkward at first, but eventually, we will get used to the idea and become more comfortable with it. It was pretty cool, I met some amazing people and got some phone numbers. There were a lot of swinging couples, swinging daters, swinging hook ups, or swingers in general. They’re all here to be free of society’s’ limitations. During the normal workdays, we are to act appropriate and proper to fit into society. The usual conversation about sex, BDSM, swinging, or being kinky was frowned upon. You could lose your job by acting on your urges. The swingers club provides an opportunity for individuals to unleash their true selves so they can be open and free. This allows us to discuss taboo subjects pertaining to sex.

 

In a normal world, if you were interested in a girl or a guy, you would have to move slow and entice them with a good conversation. Fortunately in the swingers club, if you were interested in someone, you are free to go up to them and ask for sex without having to waste time on flirting.They can either answer yes or no, whereas, in the real world, you will get slapped in the face for asking. Also in the swingers world, if you find someone’s wife or husband attractive, you can go up to them and ask to touch or hook up with them. Unfortunately in the real world, if you even dare to make any sexual suggestions to someone’s spouse, you might get punched in the face.

 

swingers clubsThe swingers club has a very animalistic feel to it. Everyone was hungry for each other and trying to turn their fantasies into reality. I didn’t do anything crazy during my first visit but I nevertheless enjoy the experience. I guess I was too shy or intimidated, it was another world that was too extravagant, real, and genuine. This enables us to step over every single boundary that separates us from animals. Through this experience, I have learned a lot about the swingers world and the people in it. The words cheating, infidelity, loyalty, control, restraint does not exist in the swingers world. Everybody is free to do as they please as long as nobody was hurt. Because of the lack of limitations, I might have to take baby steps to fully experience the swingers life. If I were to slowly get myself into this lifestyle, I would definitely invest in body-deodorant and Victoria’s Secret perfume to make myself more enticing and attractive for the opportunity.

 

At Least, I was open minded enough to witness an orgy, but not enough to try one. I was able to touch a person’s abs, but not brave enough to put my body against it. Maybe someday, I will be brave enough to live out that free, wonderful life. After all, I do have a couple of fantasies that I would like to turn into reality.

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5 Interesting Things You Might Not Know about Swingers

things you may not knowRecently it was revealed that around 10 million couples in the United States are open to having sex with someone from outside the relationship. Before we begin, this is not a reference to cheating, but sex with the permission and agreement of their partner. These people are frequently labeled as ‘swingers’, though why, how, where and who they have sex with varies enormously from one couple to the next. Generally, the term swinger applies to a couple who have sex with people from outside the marriage. The frequency and amount of sex again vary considerably, with some couples only doing it once or twice a year, while others engaging in it every weekend.

Since swinging is still such a misunderstood and marginalized subculture, here are a few interesting fact that might help you understand it a little better.

  1. Most couples don’t start swinging just because the man wants to

It is generally assumed that the man in a relationship gets bored or frustrated and therefore initiates the couples move into swinging. In fact, it is frequently the case that the women that is the one who is dissatisfied and initiates the change. The reasons for this can be numerous, they can be anything from a women’s desire to sleep with another man to her being bisexual and wishing to have explore this side of her sexuality.

Many swingers actually report that the male didn’t initiate the conversation as they were too fearful of offending their partner. As a result, it was in fact, the women who raised the possibility of swinging. Men feel too scared that they might offend by being honest and risk being seen like they might want to sleep around because their partner is not enough for them. Women generally feel like they can be more open about this subject and are more often than not, the one who brings the subject up.

  1. Swingers get jealous

Popular belief is that swingers don’t get jealous. Nothing could be further from the truth. Swingers, though not engaged in what you could call the average sexual lifestyle, are still subject to the same emotions as the rest of us. It is incredibly common to hear of swingers who have gotten jealous in some shape or form and have reacted in a way that showed offense. This jealousy could be between couples or even aimed at other swingers if, for example, an individual sees someone they like at a party going off with someone else.

The chances of the little green eyed monster rearing its ugly head are made far greater when sets of couples get to know each other more. A fairly common cause of jealousy is when two couples frequently meet to exchange partners but one couple then decides to swing with a new couple. In cases like this, it is not uncommon for the offended couple to completely cut off the other couple or at least to give them the cold shoulder.

  1. Not all swingers are in it for sex

There are loads of terms that are common parlance within the swingers community. A ‘full swap’ refers to couples who both swap partners and have full intercourse with the other people. A ‘soft swap’, on the other hand, is usually limited to not having sexual intercourse, but rather something like mild sexual stimulation that doesn’t involve full-blown sex. Some couples will only swap women, while others just like to have sex somewhere other couples are also doing the same.

With so many different people involved in swinging, it doesn’t really come as a surprise that there are so many different ways that people choose to swing. It is not uncommon to meet swingers who go to parties every weekend but who haven’t had sex with anyone for a long time. Instead, there attend just to have a good time and enjoy themselves in an environment where they can be free of inhibitions.

  1. Most swingers have a good relationship and really love each other

swinger couplesThe popular misconception about swingers is that their relationship is not really one based on true love, but rather is one they continue because of financial or family ties. There might be a convenient reason that so many people choose to believe this,particularly as it then means they are not forced to be answer a few difficult questions about their own. The fact that swingers have been honest about the lack of sexual excitement in their relationship and have chosen to engage in a more sexually open one, is a fact that disturbs many other people.

The simple truth is that swinging takes an extraordinary amount of trust, understanding, and honesty between two people. There is also a requirement to master one’s own feelings to become a stronger person when emotions such as jealousy and guilt rear their ugly head. Becoming a swinger is not for the faint-hearted and so easier dismissed by others so that they need not ask themselves more difficult questions about their own strengths and weaknesses.

  1. Swingers nearly always keep their life a secret

When was the last time you ever saw a sign on the street that read ‘swinger party this way’? The fact of the matter is that even if your neighbors were having a swinger’s party next door, you would not know that it was one. Swingers take their privacy very seriously indeed and choose to avoid any unwanted attention that might result from their lifestyle choice.

If you have not involved in the community, the chances you will even know a couple who are swingers is very small indeed. This is certainly more to do with society’s stigmas, rather than any feeling of shame. Swingers don’t have raucous all-night parties where the shouts and moans of couples having sex keep the neighborhood up all night. It just doesn’t happen.

In the end, swingers are just ordinary people who have chosen to be more open sexually. Other than this there is no difference between them and any other couple. The fact that they have chosen to be so honest with themselves and explore their desires, should give all people pause and motivate them to try to be brave enough to do the same.

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The Truths of Swinger Dating Sites You Should Know

swinger dating sitesSwinging is a modern lifestyle whose revolution started way back in the late fifties among middle aged couples who felt the need to spice up their marriage. It was also a practice which was adopted by individuals who were not in marriage but were in the process of dating. During this period, it was referred as wife swapping as it involved sharing of wives among couples, but this has changed due to the practice among the unmarried couples thereby bringing into existence the name swinging.

Swinging can be referred to as a lifestyle of non- monogamy where sexual relations happens outside the established couples. The core principle governing swingers is to avoid emotional attached during the practice hence making it be a social activity among the parties involved. In comparison with the practice in the late fifties and the present time, it can be seen than swinging has undergone tremendous changes. This has been characterized by the adaption of new technologies or best referred as the new digital era which was not in existence during the early times and which up to date is still undergoing rigorous changes thus making it better and efficient for swingers.

Swinger dating during the early times was difficult as the only way one could get into this lifestyle was through logging on one’s computer and emailing your images to the prospect couple and it took time for that message to be conveyed to the recipient. Feedback also took time since the recipient had to take his/ her time to go through the fine details of the sender to find out if they match with his/ her expectation so as to send back his/her feedback concerning the matter. Walking into an adult bookshop to purchase a swinger magazine was also a challenge as the society viewed is as an improper way. However, in the present time, this has been forgotten as the lifestyle is gaining significant popularity among individuals all over the world and its now easy to log into a swinger site using a computer, tablet or even a phone and find the right couple that suits your preference. It is easy nowadays to spot a swinger couple even in the neighborhood due to the acceptance of the lifestyle by the modern society.

Adoption of new technology has led to the emergence of new ways of swinger dating whereby new dating sites specifically for swingers have been created where all those individuals who are interested in engaging in this lifestyle can find their right partner for the act. Getting into these sites has also been simplified whereby one after going through some simple but necessary steps automatically becomes a member. There are so many sites all over the web which have different features thus making the couples to log in and be a member to those that best suit them.

The major advantage associated with online swinging dating is that there is a sense of privacy compared to seeking to hook up from the various swinger joint in the locality. Unlike in the physical swinging joints such as club, cruise ships, resorts or even private parties meant for swinger couples, online swinger dating creates a sense of privacy as the parties involved will choose to chat while avoiding been online or plan for hookups that best suits them in terms of the level of privacy that they need. In the typical swinging clubs and parties, the couple puts itself at a risk of meeting people whom may have a different perspective about the couple such as an employer, neighbors or even family member. This may affect the relationship between the various couples.

swinging activities Another disadvantage with swinging clubs is that different couples may have a different preference, and due to limited time in the clubs, they may find themselves engaging in some swinging activities which they may not be conversant with and as a result the couples involved may find themselves in dispute or misunderstanding thus affecting their relationship. There are a limited number of swingers in those clubs thus serving as a limitation to finding the right partner for swinging activities. With online swinger dating, there are many sites with a large pool of swingers from all parts of the world with different swinging preference thus making a couple to find the right qualities and choice that they may prefer.

The most important thing with online swinger dating is that they have a team of professional workers who work through 24 hours to ensure that they make the sites most efficient to serve all their clients. They also ensure that the details given by their members have been verified and a true to their best knowledge. Also, they ensure that they recruit the right members who are serious with swinging thus avoiding those who may just join with no serious intention. Most of the online swinger dates only allow members who are 18 years and above to ensure that only adults and like-minded individuals get enrolled into their site. It also ensures that the members can relate effectively with the language and policies of these sites. The sites also allow individuals from a different background, culture gender, and marital status to join and this ensures that different individuals get the right Partner who suites their specification and preference.

Online swinger sites allow couple members to find the right couple in their locality since people joining them have to offer their geographical location information so that other prospects who may be in the same locality can meet them. It also makes the site efficient as it connects users across the globe easily. Some couples only prefer certain swinging activities. they may include phone sex, role playing, or even voyeurism among others and all these can be found easily on various dating sites available on the web.  With the massive adoption of swinging as a lifestyle all over the world, swinger dating is now efficient as couples can choose either the online dating or visit the various dating joints in their locality.

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Enjoyment of Swinging Sex Only Swinger Couples Know

swinging couplesIn the recent past, there has been an increasing debate on the new lifestyle which has emerged known as swinging. The genesis of this lifestyle started in the early fifties where it was referred to as wife swapping where it started gaining popularity among middle – aged couples. Being a new way of life, there were a lot of debates about it as some viewed it as improper behavior which had an adverse effect on women as they viewed it as an act of male domination while others supported it entirely saying that it was beneficial to both the married and the unmarried individuals. Swinging can be referred to as a lifestyle of non-monogamy where sexual relations happen outside the established couple. The primary attitude among swingers is to avoid romantic attachment with their outside partners thereby making it a social activity.

Swinger couples are partners who choose to maintain an open relationship where they allow their partners to engage in sex with other people, with their permission. Couples who seek this kind of lifestyle are mostly interested in excitement from another partner which they may not be getting from their main partners. For instance, an individual may be enjoying the way someone else satisfies him/ her which may not be the same with their long term partner. Another case maybe when a couple gets a child, and the woman cannot engage in sexual activities in not less than six weeks after birth thus making the man to find a way of fulfilling his sexual desires with the consent of the wife. Swinging among couples is based on trust and the fact that the couple is very secure with each other thus making it comfortable to engage in this lifestyle. A partner may have traveled away from the other partner thus giving him/ her consent to participate in sexual fulfillment with another partner.

Swinging among couples has proved to be advantageous among those who engage in it as with the practice; there is a new friendship created among the players which may be of the opposite sex while enjoying sexual pleasures all together. It improves the bedroom relationship as some couples may choose to watch other couples and learn from them on how to create sexual excitement thus spicing their marriage. Several studies have shown that couples who engage in swinging have an increased ego, self-esteem as well as an improved sexual mood. Therefore, these couples experience a lasting relationship as there is a reduced pressure in the bedroom and also making those who find it difficult to be faithful to their partner acceptable and be able to bring up a healthy family.

There are several methods associated with swinging which range from soft, closed and open swinging and different couples choose each method according to their preference.  Soft swinging is among the core procedures of introducing a couple into the lifestyle. In this method, one set of partners share the same sexual space with other partners, but there is no touching of other partners apart from your mate. The method is mostly a foreplay with other members in the sexual room while having intercourse with only your partner. The other way of swinging is the closed swinging which is largely regarded by many as for the most experienced swingers. The method involves taking one or more partners in a room away from your main partner and having penetrative sex with them. With this method its main objective is to have sexual freedom among partners with different persons, while still maintaining privacy in the primary relationship.

Open or full swap swinging is the other most common method of swinging. With this approach, partners are openly shared mostly on the same bed. The method may engage a threesome, foursome or even more and the primary objective of the process is to obtain sexual pleasure while still maintaining a direct contact with the main partner. Open or full swapping may result to negative emotions, disagreement and jealousy among the major partners hence there is need to give out limits which must be adhered to before engaging in this activity. In most cases, this method of swinging is mainly used by experienced swingers due to the stated problems that may arise.

swinger activitiesSwinger dating has gone through tremendous changes over the years, and today it is easy to spot a swinger in the locality. In the past swing dating was difficult as the participants had a tiresome procedure of emailing their images to their prospects and also getting feedback from them took time. Also having the confidence to walk into an adult bookstore and to purchase a magazine was a challenge but today individuals engaging in swinger dating can quickly and conveniently log on to a swinger dating site using their computers or mobile apps where they can find like-minded adults. These dating sites have a huge number of participants thus making it easy for an individual to get the right partner who best fits one’s specification and preference.

Hooking up among swingers has become comfortable as most of the countries have well-established clubs where the swingers meet and hookup with other swingers in a friendly atmosphere for such activities. There are also resorts, cruise ships, conventions private parties and other related events where swinger couples can hook up easily. These hookup places differ from each other as one may find others with rooms which are dark where strangers engage in sexual activities without knowing each other while other rooms may be for swapping partners among couples and others for observation only where partners observe and learn from the players.

With the widespread of this lifestyle, it is now evident that it is becoming an accepted lifestyle choice among individuals all over the world as opposed to the past where it was considered as an extreme alternative lifestyle. This is evident with the massive growth in dating sites, the openness of swingers in talking about and also the large attendance of swingers in the swinger clubs and other gathering places.

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Why It is Okay to Try Swinging Dating

swinger lifestyleNowadays, alternative relationship styles are becoming more and more prevalent. No longer is monogamy the only option—open relationships and swinging lifestyles are often portrayed in the media, although not in a positive light every time. There is still stigma around swingers, and some people regard them as cheaters who can’t stay faithful. However, there are really a ton of reasons to consider swinging and opening up your relationship to new sexual experiences. You never know, it could save your marriage.

With that said, here are some reasons why a swinging lifestyle might be a good fit for you.

Swinger couples divorce less

Couples who swing are known to have stronger, longer lasting marriages than monogamous couples. The facts show that they have a decreased rate of divorce than their monogamous counterparts. Although we don’t know for sure why this is, there are many plausible reasons.

Some people believe monogamy isn’t a natural way to live. It’s normal to be attracted to other people, even if you are married, and resisting temptation is often difficult. If your partner can’t give you everything you need emotionally and physically, leaving room for you to desire others, then you may be tempted to sleep with someone else. Cheating is one of the number one reasons for divorce in the world, and swingers effectively dodge that bullet entirely.

Swinging is not superior to monogamy, nor is monogamy superior to swinging. It all depends on the person. Some couples are not equipped to share their spouses with other people—foursomes can be awkward and create jealousy. If you’re prone to jealousy, you should work on those feelings first before diving into swinging.

Reduce cheating

Swingers do not cheat nearly as much as monogamous couples. They are able to share their partners and indulge themselves in having sex with new, interesting people. Cheating happens when someone is feeling like their sexual—and maybe emotional—needs are not being met. If you can meet each other’s needs in a monogamous relationship, great! If not, swinging is a great option. Maybe the other woman is willing to fulfill a desire of your husbands that you don’t want to engage in. If he has the opportunity to act that out, he’s not going to be likely to cheat.

People cheat on their partners and keep it secret because they are fearful of their spouse’s reaction. If the spouse is also involved—and enjoying it equally as much—there is no room for fear. Monogamous couples can fall into a jealousy trap. Some think that if their partner makes any gesture or comment at or toward someone they’re attracted to, then it will result in an affair and cheating. This fear just doesn’t exist in swingers, and they are more mentally healthy because of it. What’s funny, though, is that many cheaters would not dare partake in a swinging relationship, because they are fearful of their partner cheating on them.

Fulfill fantasies

Every person has a sexual fantasy that they are dying to have fulfilled. Maybe it’s to have a foursome or to sleep with two men or women at once. Or, maybe you want to try playing with the same sex in a safe environment. Swinging is a very safe place for couples to act out their fantasies in a way that isn’t harmful to the relationship.

Not everyone is interested in doing every sex act. If your partner is unwilling to do something sexual that you’re dying to do—maybe you want someone to put on a costume or roleplay—then that can create resentment and may even lead to cheating. If you are able to act these fantasies out in an environment where you have your partners approval, everyone comes out happy.

Strengthen your relationship

Couples who swing report greater relationship satisfaction, which is obvious when you consider that they divorce less. They’re better able to fulfill their sexual desires while maintaining the emotional connection they have with their primary partner.

Having sex with other people and seeing your partner do so as well has a way of strengthening the bond between two people in a relationship. It’s a new experience that you’re both diving into together, and that increases trust.

Learn new moves

If you’ve been married for twenty years and have only been having sex with the same person, you probably are doing the same old positions and moves every single time. You’re no longer learning new ways to please your partner, and things are maybe getting kind of stale.

When you start having sex with other couples, you can see the way they like to do things. Maybe they know a move or two that you haven’t thought of but are actually really pleasurable for you and your spouse. If you swing once and don’t end up liking it, at least you’ll have learned a bunch of new techniques and positions that you and your spouse can adopt and use in your personal sex life.

Meet new people

Swinging gives you the opportunity to put yourself out there. You and your spouse will have the chance to meet people you otherwise never would have. If you become a regular in the swinging scene, you may meet some people who end up becoming life-long friends.

Many swinger pairs go on vacations and trips together and actually build really strong, solid friendships. That may sound uncomfortable to you, but once you meet a couple who you and your spouse click with, it becomes similar to dating someone new.

Now, swinging isn’t for everyone. As I said, it really requires a couple to be secure in their relationship before attempting it. Swinging isn’t a way to fix a marriage in turmoil. Instead, it’s a way to meet new people, act out some sexual fantasies, and strengthen the bond between you and your spouse.

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